Christmas ~ it's nearly here

Then the TV adverts begin, promising that happiness comes wrapped in whatever product they’re selling. If you don’t have it, well, you might as well cancel Christmas altogether. Adverts for turkeys assure us they’re the best in the world, thanks to being free-range, massaged daily, or serenaded by choirs.

And of course, no Christmas is complete without a new sofa, carpet, big-screen TV, or dining table. If you don’t buy an oak dining suite with wingback chairs, you risk ruining Grandma’s life forever—or so they’d have you believe.

Christmas trees now make their debut in November, and if you’re unlucky enough to live opposite someone who’s bought 500,000 bright blue “chaser” lights, you’re in for migraines until January. The shops are hot and chaotic, full of frazzled shoppers, endless Christmas songs, and confused people picking up items, shaking their heads, and putting them back. In some aisles, tempers flare as parents fight over the latest must-have toy because Little Jamie’s life apparently hinges on owning a killer zombie hamster with a kung-fu kick (that usually gets forgotten by Boxing Day!).

The supermarkets are even worse. People stockpile baked beans and soup as if the world is ending, even though the shops are only shut for a single day. The queues stretch endlessly—even at 4 a.m.—leaving you to wonder why there’s no broccoli left and whether you can dye cauliflower green. Spoiler: you can’t.

Every aisle greets you with either a battery-operated Santa crooning a cringe-worthy carol or an inflatable Snowman belting out ''I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day''. (Although, I actually like that song ~ but it can be a tad wearing after hearing it 58 times in a row).

And then comes Black Friday, where people sit glued to screens at 3 a.m., waiting for lightning deals on pizza cutters shaped like motorbikes, all while questioning the direction of their lives.

Everything about Christmas has become louder, bigger, and more over-the-top, putting immense pressure on everyone to deliver a "perfect" day. (But no one wants to admit there is no such thing as a ''perfect day'' and most of us end up in another room cooling off for a while !)

The Other Side of Christmas

The streets and screens are filled with images of happy shoppers, warm family gatherings, and tables overflowing with food and laughter. It’s easy to feel jealous, imagining the picture-perfect holiday you believe others are enjoying. But for many, Christmas isn’t like that at all.

For some, it’s a joyful time full of festivities, food, and loved ones. Yet, for others, it can bring stress and anxiety. Whether or not you live with mental health challenges, the holidays can magnify feelings of loneliness, financial strain, and pressure to meet impossible expectations. It’s a time when obligations mount—social plans, gift-giving, and the need to appear festive—and these demands can feel overwhelming.

For those living with mental illness or isolation, Christmas can be one of the hardest times of the year. Waking up on Christmas morning can feel like a savage reminder of what’s missing. The evidence of your perceived exclusion is everywhere—in cheerful music, in adverts showing laughing families, and in every corner of a world that seems designed for togetherness and your day may not be together or happy.

Surviving Christmas Day: A Faithful Perspective

For those who celebrate the spiritual meaning of Christmas, attending a church service can be a comforting and uplifting way to honor the true reason for the season—the birth of Christ.

1. Attend a Church Service

• Celebrate Christ’s Birth: Christmas is, at its heart, a celebration of Jesus’ birth, and taking time to focus on its spiritual meaning can bring peace and joy to your day.

• Community and Worship: Many churches hold services on Christmas morning, offering a chance to gather with others, sing carols, and reflect on the hope and love that Christ brings to the world.

• Virtual Services: If you’re unable to attend in person, many churches stream their Christmas services online, allowing you to participate from the comfort of your home.

2. Reflect on the Meaning of Christmas

• Spend Time in Prayer or Devotion: Use the quiet moments of the day to pray, meditate, or read scripture. Passages like Luke 2:1-20 remind us of the simplicity and wonder of Christ’s birth.

• Light a Candle: Symbolize the light of Christ in the world and take a moment to reflect on the hope and renewal that His birth brings.

3. Seek Connection Through Faith

• Join a Church Community: Whether you’re attending a service in person or online, connecting with fellow worshippers can help combat feelings of loneliness.

• Sing or Listen to Carols: Music is a powerful way to connect to the joy and hope of the season. Sing along with traditional hymns like Silent Night or Hark! The Herald Angels Sing.

4. Find Comfort in the Message of Hope

• Focus on the Gift of Christ: Amid the busyness and commercialization of Christmas, remember that the greatest gift is not something you can buy. It’s the love, grace, and salvation offered through Jesus.

• Embrace the Peace of the Nativity: Reflect on the humble beginnings of Jesus’ life and how His presence brought light to even the darkest places.

5. Ideas for Worship

• Local Church Services: Check the schedules of nearby churches for midnight masses, Christmas Eve services, or Christmas morning worship.

• Televised or Online Services: Look for live streams or recordings from renowned churches, like Westminster Abbey or local cathedrals, to feel part of a larger worshipping community.

Attending church or focusing on the spiritual aspects of Christmas can provide a deep sense of peace, connection, and purpose, even if you’re spending the day alone. After all, Christmas reminds us that we are never truly alone—God’s love is always with us.

Surviving Christmas Day in other ways

If Christmas feels like a challenging day, there are ways to reframe it, manage emotions, and even create moments of peace and joy. Here are some strategies to help you get through the day:

Change the Narrative

• Redefine the Day: Remember, Christmas doesn’t have to look like the adverts. It can be whatever you want it to be—a quiet day, a self-care retreat, or even just a regular day.

• Focus on Your Own Story: Instead of dwelling on what’s missing, think about what you want the day to represent. Perhaps it’s a time for rest, reflection, or starting new traditions.

Plan Your Day in Advance

• Have a Schedule: Decide how you want to spend the day, even if it’s just a loose outline. Having a plan can help you feel more in control.

• Treat It Like Any Other Day: If celebrating feels too hard, treat Christmas like any other day. Go for a walk, read, or binge-watch your favorite shows.

• Do Something Special: Plan an activity you’ll enjoy, like cooking a favorite meal, opening a small gift for yourself, or starting a project you’ve been meaning to try.

Connect in Any Way You Can

• Reach Out: Call or video chat with loved ones, even if it’s just a short conversation. Connection, even virtually, can lift your spirits.

• Volunteer: Many charities and community groups need help on Christmas Day. Giving your time to help others can bring a sense of purpose and belonging.

• Join a Virtual Gathering: If being physically alone is tough, look for online events or meetups. Many organizations host virtual Christmas parties or support groups.

Practice Self-Care

• Be Kind to Yourself: Acknowledge that it’s okay to feel sad or lonely. Allow yourself to feel your emotions without judgment.

• Do What Feels Good: Whether it’s staying in pajamas all day, taking a bubble bath, or going for a long walk, prioritize what makes you feel comfortable and content.

• Avoid Triggers: If certain activities (like scrolling social media) make you feel worse, give yourself permission to avoid them.

Engage in Distraction

• Dive Into Entertainment: Watch movies, read a great book, or listen to a podcast that keeps your mind occupied.

• Create Something: Use the day to bake, paint, write, or try a new hobby. Creativity can be both calming and fulfilling.

• Move Your Body: Exercise, even a gentle walk, can boost endorphins and improve your mood.

Focus on the Future

• Plan for the New Year: Spend time reflecting on what you’d like to achieve or experience in the coming year. Create a vision board or write down goals to help you look forward.

• Book Something Exciting: Plan a trip, a class, or an event for the weeks ahead. Having something to anticipate can make the day feel less heavy.

Seek Support If You Need It

• Talk to Someone: If the day feels overwhelming, consider reaching out to a helpline or support service. There’s no shame in seeking help. (Services)

• Online Communities: Forums, social media groups, or mental health platforms can provide comfort and understanding from others who feel the same way.

Remember: You’re Not Alone

Many people find Christmas difficult, whether they’re single, isolated, or grieving. It’s okay to experience this day differently than others—and it’s okay to prioritize your own needs. Surviving the day isn’t about perfection; it’s about finding small moments of peace and doing what feels right for you.